Thursday, April 01, 2010

Nicholas Sparks=Tucker Max

Nicholas Sparks, noted author of shitty books, thinks there is someone you just gotta read. Who? Nicholas Sparks. Promoting the latest of his books to be turned into Hollywood dreck, Sparks lays it on the line for USA Today.

Whose books are most like Sparks'? Hmmmm, how about that journalist fellow who spent time in Cuba?

Sparks pulls the one beside it off the shelf. "A Farewell to Arms, by Hemingway. Good stuff. That's what I write," he says, putting it back. "That's what I write."

In case you are thinking he misspoke, he also compares his work to that of Shakespeare, Austen and Sophocles.

You know who sucks? Cormac McCarthy.

"Horrible," he says, looking at Blood Meridian. "This is probably the most pulpy, overwrought, melodramatic cowboy vs. Indians story ever written."

Let's get real. Not one of Sparks' books is good enough to wipe McCarthy's ass. The hubris is astounding, but he's not done.

Sparks' favorite tale of youth? "I think A Walk to Remember," he says, citing his own novel. "That's my version of a coming-of-age." He pauses and adds: "You have to sayTo Kill a Mockingbird is an all-time classic." (emphasis added)

The man is without shame.


Brack said...

About the only positive thing I can say about this asshat is that he apparently live in New Bern, NC, which is about 20 miles from the town of Beaufort and Atlantic Beach, two of my favorites places in the Carolinas.

Tripp said...

Dude,I have to like him even less now. He is probably a giant karma sink on the whole region. Cow's milk souring, babies not taking the breast, beer going skunky, I bet those are common problems down there.

Neill said...

I am furious.

Tripp said...

I suspect this universe is not large enough to contain your rage.